Bjcorbin's Blog

For those of you who have kids that are over ten years old, you’ll probably relate to this little song.  Up until the last year or so, my younger kids really thought I was cool; but now they’re pretty embarrassed by me.  The other day, as my ten year old son and I were walking through a store, I heard an old song playing and mentioned it to him.  Without even looking at me, he blurted out, “Dad don’t dance!”  It came out sounding like it might be his deepest fear and it kind of made me laugh.  I decided to embrace my new role by writing this little ditty for them.  They would definitely do it as a rap song (for those whose kids or grandkids watch too much Disney Channel, think “Phineas and Ferb”).

Dad U know I love ya

I promise that it’s true

 But there are certain things

A dad should never do

*

Like kissin’ Mom in public

Or touchin’ in any way

Pretend that she’s your sister

RU hearin’ what I say

*

Don’t ever honk the horn

When U pull up in the car

Cuz I’m liable to pretend

I don’t know who UR

*

Don’t write stuff on my clothes

When I’m headin’ off to camp

 And no I don’t like spaceships

On my bedside lamp

*

There are so many things

U need to understand

If there’s any hope that

I’ll survive to be a man

Like the laws of nature

No way to get around

Like gravity and taxes

2 which we all R bound

See Dad’s should never sing

Or shimmy, shake or prance

Shouldn’t even move their hips

Cause “Dads Don’t Dance!”

(Background Singers echo – Dad’s don’t dance)

*

Please don’t call me “buddy”

Or “honey”, “pal” or “dude”

Don’t pull out those old pictures

Cause that would just be rude

*

Don’t try to tell a joke

When friends are in the car

And never let them see U

playing air guitar

*

Don’t call out from the bleachers

No matter how I play

Don’t put my name on T-shirts

No matter what they say

*

Know you’re only tryin’ 2 help

And be there for your boy

But things that once were cool

Can sometimes just annoy

*

There are so many things

U need to understand

If there’s any hope that

I’ll survive to be a man

Like the laws of nature

No way to get around

Like gravity and taxes

2 which we all R bound

See Dad’s should never sing

Or shimmy, shake or prance

 Shouldn’t even move their hips

Cause “Dads Don’t Dance!”

(Background Singers echo – Dad’s don’t dance)

 

(As the music fades, we hear a 10 year old voice talking)

No, no – Dads don’t dance

And since we’re already talking

Can we talk about fashion?

Really Dad, those shorts (groan)

 And do we really need a mini-van

Oh and that hair

Come on Dad

And don’t even get me started about Mom…