When you grow up in your father’s cornfield, you can convince yourself that you know something about farming. But over time, a lack of good seed, and neglect of the soil, take their toll. With each successive generation expecting more, and less willing to replenish the land, a once fruitful plain slips into barrenness. Such is the story of America, where we’ve scoffed at the wisdom of those who came before us, and find ourselves reaping of the hybrid seed we’ve chosen to sow.
Archive for the ‘Commentaries’ Category
Thought for the Day – Fruitful Plains & Barren Lands
Posted in Commentaries, Thought for the Day / Quotes, tagged decline of America, forefathers, Reaping what you sow, scoffing at the wisdom of the past on December 10, 2013| 3 Comments »
Thought for the Day – The Accuser
Posted in Commentaries, Parenting / Family, Thought for the Day / Quotes, tagged Accuser, Coach, Parent, Preacher, Teacher, Zeal on November 19, 2013| 1 Comment »
The danger for parents, preachers, teachers, and coaches is that when the people we’re trying to reach don’t respond in the way we think they ought to, we can unwittingly take on the voice of “The Accuser” (e.g. your don’t think you have to listen to me, you think you know better than me, you’re awfully quiet out there – I must be stepping on some toes, you don’t really care, you’re just lazy, you have an attitude…) . When our zeal to get our point across provokes us this way we ultimately undermine the value of our message. We cannot lose sight of the fact that our role is to plant and water seeds, and that only God can bring the increase.
Thought for the Day – Our Attitude
Posted in Commentaries, Thought for the Day / Quotes on September 18, 2013| Leave a Comment »
Our attitude is like a bushel basket; it can either be a vessel used to display some inviting fruit or a lid used to conceal the light within.
Thought for the Day – Relationships in Reverse
Posted in Commentaries, Thought for the Day / Quotes on September 17, 2013| Leave a Comment »
Relationships were never designed with a reverse gear. They were crafted to move steadily in one direction, becoming deeper and more profound as they go. Trying to take a relationship from a once intimate level to a now casual level will always be unnatural and damaging. This is one of the many reasons that God hates things like divorce and unforgiveness.
Patterns
Posted in Commentaries, Opinions, tagged patterns, patterns of behavior, patterns of thought, religion, repentence, rituals on July 29, 2013| 1 Comment »
As human beings we are creatures of habit. It normally begins with a pattern of thought, which often evokes a specific pattern of emotion, which generally results in a certain pattern of behavior. In and of itself, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but even a relatively healthy pattern can sour over time. Just as we have a natural tendency to adopt these patterns, we also seem inclined to get stuck inside of them. Unwittingly they begin to shape our concept of reality and of how we fit within it. For too many of us, the pattern of our lives repeats itself over and over again. Given enough time, we can easily begin to derive a sense of security (and maybe even identity) from our pattern; and if we’re not careful, we can quickly become a slave to it.
Patterns tend to breed rituals, and rituals tend to spawn religion, which is what causes us to rage against anyone or anything that might suggest we need to alter our pattern. I remember working in a bar years ago, watching people cry in their beer about how terrible their lives were, only to have them curse the bartender who dared propose that maybe they should make a change. I’ve heard it said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting it to turn out differently. Based on that measure, there would seem to be a good many of us battling this affliction.
Assuming that all of that is true, it should then come as little surprise that “repentance” is a significant tenet of the Christian life. While many still associate that word with the idea of being sorry or regretting their actions, it actually refers to a change of mind or a change of direction (i.e. a change of pattern). But more than that, I don’t believe that God would simply have us trade our old bad sinful pattern for a shiny new sanctified one. I sense that the life He’s authored for us is meant to be filled with growth and spontaneity and wonder; none of which happens when you consistently march in circles (even when those steps are taken within the walls of the temple). Indeed, the security and familiarity that accompanies repetition would seem to be the antithesis of faith.
To my mind, one of the great flaws of religion across the ages has been its propensity to create a pattern and then to spend all of its resources trying to defend and preserve it from change. I believe that one of the reasons the Lord sent His Holy Spirit to dwell within us was to free us from the bondage that comes with being trapped within a rigid pattern.
While I’m not suggesting that there shouldn’t be a certain consistency within the life of a true believer (which could rightfully be described as a pattern), I am saying that if we are not diligent, adherence to our pattern can take precedence over the dynamic, real time relationship that the Lord intended for us to have with Him. When that happens, it not only impacts the believer, but everyone that the Lord means to touch through them.
As I have endeavored to walk with the Lord over the years, I have found that He consistently challenges the presuppositions that are so often used to prop up my pattern. It’s not always that what I have supposed is necessarily wrong, but at best it is incomplete. Ultimately, I need to guard my heart against the complacency that so naturally accompanies a pattern.
In other words, am I really listening for His voice or do I believe that I know Him so well that I already know what He’d say? I sense that this is part of what Jesus was saying when He admonished us to come as little children (Matt. 18:3). Don’t come as an accomplished veteran, who is filled with his own ideas & experiences. Come as a child, who genuinely relies on his Father for guidance. Even for the seasoned follower, that is a pattern worth adopting.
Walking the Parenting Tightrope
Posted in Commentaries, Opinions, Parenting / Family, tagged chastened, discipline, parenting, provoke, provoke to wrath, raising children, spare the rod on June 26, 2013| 10 Comments »
When I first got married, at the ripe old age of 19 yrs. old, I was still too much of a child to seriously consider having children of my own. Throughout my early twenties, as I listened to my peers speak of their parenting struggles, I naively wondered why handling a few small children should be such a big deal. Undoubtedly, my heavenly Father must have chuckled at the understanding of what my future held.
In my early thirties, my first marriage crumbled and I was grateful that at least there were no little ones to get snagged in the wreckage. A couple of years later, as a new life emerged for me, I was blessed to become a step-father and little by little the eyes of my understanding began to open. Less than a year after that came a baby boy; and less than a year after that came twins (a boy and a girl). Going 0 to 4 children in less than 24 months is something like going 0 to 60 mph in 2.4 seconds. Needless to say, the years that have followed have been a crash course in the joys and challenges of parenting.
Early on, it’s tempting to believe that a colicky baby, who doesn’t sleep through the night, represents a huge ordeal. But as the years pass the climb gets significantly steeper. As a child’s capacity to act independently develops and their world expands, both the possibilities and complexities compound exponentially. Though each stage of life presents its own unique set of hurdles, there is perhaps no greater ache for a parent than to watch their grown child fall headlong into a trap that they’ve been warned about since childhood, or that the parent unwittingly set them up for.
The pop cultural landscape is littered with countless resources for parents who are diligently seeking guidance, and while many of them do possess some degree of merit, none could rightfully be considered definitive. Each child is their own puzzle and there is no “one size fits all” approach for raising them.
Our three youngest children weren’t even a year apart, with two of them being twins. Additionally, they were home schooled until the 3rd/4th grade, which means that their “shared life experience” was almost identical through their “formative” years. Based on popular thinking, this consistent and stable environment should have created striking similarities in the way these kids function on a day to day basis, but nothing could be further from the truth.
I have found that each one thinks differently, learns differently, is inspired differently, expresses themselves differently, fears different things, has different strengths… What works well with one, is often useless with another. I have yet to find the piece of parenting advice (other than “pray without ceasing”) that can blindly be applied, and hope to be effective with every child.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to understand that there truly isn’t anything new under the sun and that the struggles of today have all been encountered by previous generations. In looking to the scripture for answers, an amazingly consistent message rings out from the book of Proverbs, which is that discipline needs to be a consistent part of wise parenting. Chapter 13, verse 24 says that “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him”. Chapter 22, verse 15 says, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him”. Chapter 23, verses 13 & 14 say, “Do not withhold discipline from a child” and that punishing him will, “save his soul from death”. Finally, chapter 29, verse 15 says, “The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother”.
Certainly, these passages sound harsh in light of our delicate, westernized, politicized sensibilities, but their truth is hard to deny. All one needs to do is to observe any person who was raised without the benefit of boundaries, consequences and discipline to understand the essentialness of these elements. The book of Hebrews expands on this topic in chapter 12, as it explains that discipline is a means that a father uses to teach a son. It also acknowledges that going through that process isn’t pleasant, but that it is ultimately for the son’s benefit.
If one simply focuses on those passages, a picture of the stereotypical, rigid, religious, authoritarian parenting approach can easily emerge. But a more comprehensive reading of scripture reveals a very different and far more challenging aesthetic. Throughout the New Testament, the Apostle Paul reminds us that unless love remains at the center of our motivation, our actions become of no eternal value. He also charges us with demonstrating Christ’s character in all situations, most especially before our wives and children.
Interestingly, in both the book of Ephesians (6:4) and Colossians (3:21), he warns that we should not provoke (i.e. embitter, exasperate) our children to wrath (i.e. anger, frustration). I don’t believe he’s saying that we should never make them angry, because as the Hebrews passage acknowledges, no one likes to be chastened.
I believe the key word in these passages is “provoke”. And I would submit that he is challenging us to discern between those instances when we are genuinely trying to train our kids and when we’re just taking our frustrations out on them; or when we’re simply acting out of our own woundedness; or maybe even when we’re intentionally trying to hurt them like they hurt us. I believe that they recognize the difference, and that we as parents need to as well.
Finding the balance of things is a daily battle for any parent. We want to convey God’s unconditional love to our children, but we also need to help them to understand consequences. We want to provide for them, but we also need to allow them to encounter enough resistance to grow strong and stand on their own two feet. We want to let them know that they can count on us, but not make them reliant on us in the process.
We need to develop the ability to relate to them on their level without forfeiting the authority (& responsibility) that God has given us as parents. We cannot live in fear of their disapproval, as that will keep us from ever preparing them to make their own way in the world. We need to raise them with the understanding that the season of our influence is limited and that God never intended for them to remain as children.
If I’ve made good parenting sound like a daunting task, that is purely intentional. It is the best and hardest job you could ever have. I believe the only way to be a truly effective parent is to tap into the wisdom and guidance of the Father of us all. The scripture says that apart from Him, we can do nothing. That is especially true of parenting.
10 Lies the Enemy is Always Peddling
Posted in Commentaries, Lists on March 18, 2013| 2 Comments »
1. You can have your cake and eat it too. I’ve heard it said that the person who tries to make the best of both worlds generally makes nothing of either of them; while the Bible says that a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways. The enemy of our souls loves it when we waiver between two opinions, as it is sure to breed compromise.
2. “They” did “that” on purpose. Healthy relationships are at the core of everything that God accomplishes through mankind; so it follows that relational discord is a primary goal for our adversary. Presuming to know the motivations of someone else’s heart and the idea that people are generally “out to get us”, create fertile ground for vain imaginations and interpersonal strife.
3. You need what “they” have. The root of covetousness is formed when we fail to appreciate the things we already have. As we begin to compare our lot to everyone else’s, it normally bursts to the surface as fully developed feelings of envy and avarice; which ultimately poison everything they come in contact with.
4. You’re alone / you’re the only one / you’re on your own. Even a ferocious predator (e.g. a lion) takes the time to separate its prey from the herd and generally picks on the sick or lame. So it is with our enemy, who wants us to feel isolated and to battle out of our own strength. Even people of great faith, like the prophet Elijah, can fall into this trap under the right circumstances (see 1 Kings 19:14-18).
5. Nothing ever goes right for you / you can never catch a break. Like covetousness, self-pity tends to begin with a failure to recognize or appreciate the blessings we’ve already received. It effectively cuts us off from our source for strength and peace, as it implicitly declares that He is not faithful to complete the good work He has begun in us; that He does in fact leave us and forsake us; and that ultimately His grace is not sufficient for us.
6. It’s not your fault. Though these words sound almost comforting on the surface, it is rare that we don’t actually bear some responsibility for our circumstance. When we fail to acknowledge our role in a problem, we unwittingly forfeit the ability to bring about any substantive change to the situation.
7. It’s all your fault. Those who are unwilling to blame someone else for their problems can often fall the opposite way, into the trap of condemnation. The Bible says that the “Accuser of the Brethren” makes accusation against God’s people day and night (Rev. 12:10), though it also points out that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Rom. 8:1). Acknowledging our legitimate responsibility in a given situation, without attempting to shoulder the weight of the entire issue, is a key element in diffusing the arguments of our adversary.
8. I am too powerful to resist / you are too weak to stop me. Though our enemy roars like a lion, he does not possess the unchecked power of a true devourer. The scripture tells us that if we’d simply submit ourselves to God and resist the devil, he (i.e. the enemy) would flee (James 4: 7).
9. It will always be this way / this is as good as it gets / you’re at the end of your rope. These thoughts, and many others like them, are meant to conjure a state of hopelessness. Just as our bodies cannot survive without water, so our souls cannot be sustained without hope.
10. If people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you. This idea is meant to keep us from ever stepping into the fullness of who God created us to be. Since we were all made in His image, becoming that person would not only cause others to be drawn to us, it would also allow us to find the treasure within ourselves.
Technical Difficulties
Posted in Commentaries, Opinions, Social / Political, tagged faith in technology, The problem with technology, virtual reality on February 13, 2014| Leave a Comment »
We certainly live in a time of amazing technological advancements, and while many of those developments have represented a significant enhancement from the status quo, there have also been some troubling side effects. I’ve listed a few of those below:
• Diminishing problem solving/critical thinking skills – Our minds are like our physical bodies, they need to be exercised to remain strong and healthy. Increasingly, we have an “App.” for just about everything, and we have quickly grown accustomed to doing things with the push of a button. More and more, the technology is doing the thinking for us, and we are progressively losing our ability to do things manually. When the technology fails us, we are generally thrown into a state of turmoil, and are often unable to proceed.
• Diminishing perseverance and endurance – Since most of these advances tend to make things faster and easier, our expectations are evolving accordingly. As time goes on, our patience and tolerance for anything that doesn’t come fast and easy is waning. The emerging generations are growing up with the concept that everything in life ought to be like that, and a growing reluctance to endure anything that is not.
• Trading the real world for virtual reality – The cyber-world has grown to become its own alternate reality, and for many, it has begun to eclipse the real world. Progressively, westerners are spending a lot more time interacting with digital screens than with each other. Most have a lot more “friends” on their social networking site than actual people they associate with regularly, and many seem to be losing their ability to express themselves in complete sentences or beyond 140 characters.
• A growing “faith” in technology – Young people seem to take great pride in the technological advances of recent years. They tend to view them as a defining characteristic of their generation. And because of this, they don’t necessarily feel bound to the lessons of history. In the minds of many, the failures of previous generations are rooted in their lack of good technology. For them, there is no problem that humanity has that technology won’t soon resolve.
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