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5 Inevitable Outcomes of Relative Truth

March 1, 2010 by bjcorbin

5 Inevitable Outcomes of Relative Truth

Statistics indicate that somewhere between two-thirds and three-fourths of adults in America believe that the truth is relative (i.e. that each person defines what truth is for themselves).  Though this philosophy goes by many names (e.g. enlightenment, secular humanism, post modernism, moral relativism…), they all hinge on the idea that truth is more a perception than an absolute (e.g. what I view as truth, may not necessarily be truth to you).  While on a superficial level this point of view might seem graciously tolerant, a deeper inspection reveals profound implications for a society that adopts such a philosophy.  In light of that, I offer these thoughts on what I believe are the very natural consequences of embracing this paradigm.

1.      Self-Centeredness:  A belief that the truth is absolute will generally cause us to search for it outside of ourselves and to view truth as transcendent to our own experience.  It tends to make us more willing to embrace concepts that are beyond our understanding (e.g. a higher purpose or a higher power).  A belief that the truth is relative will generally cause us to turn inward in our quest for truth and to limit it to whatever we can conceive of.  This tends to cause us to live on a more instinctual level, driven largely by how we feel at any given moment.

2.      Broken promises / vows:  Detractors of absolute truth tend to view its immovable nature as oppressive, while seeing the transient nature of relative truth as attractive.  But for those on the receiving end of promises and/or vows, the dynamic nature of relative truth is a legitimate cause for concern; as those who no longer wish to be bound by the limits of their vows can simply redefine their parameters for truth, thereby voiding any previous agreements.  In such cases, the perpetrator will generally rationalize that their mistake wasn’t in breaking the vow, but in making the vow in the first place.

3.      Disunity:  For a society, a community or even a family to be truly functional there must be a willingness on the part of the individuals to forfeit some amount of their personal autonomy for the greater well-being of the group.  The incentive for such sacrifice normally lies within a shared value system or maybe even a commonality of purpose.  Generally, during a nation’s formative stage, a document is forged, which ultimately reflects the commonly held values or goals under which the people choose to unite.  Our own constitution, which has been one of the most successful documents of its kind, hangs all of its lofty principles upon the relatively simple phrase, “we hold these truths to be self evident”.  At the point that each man adopts their own concept of truth, that statement ceases to be accurate; which ultimately renders the words that follow – meaningless. While relative truth would seem to be very liberating on an individual basis, it is highly destructive to the concept of national unity. 

4.      Lawlessness: The concept of a law is that a society agrees to set a limit, boundary or constraint on what is acceptable within that society.  The agreement on where that limit should be set hinges on some common standard by which to measure acceptable behavior.  In a society that embraces the idea that every man is allowed to define truth for themselves, every law becomes susceptible to the charge that it is an obstacle to personal liberty.  If our goal is to elevate individual freedom to that level, than there is no standard that could ever truly be enforced; which by definition creates a state of lawlessness.

5.      Godlessness:  The concept of fearing God is rooted in the idea that He is powerful, that there is good and evil, and that we will ultimately give some sort of accounting for our lives one day.  But if the truth is genuinely relative, then a just God would have no basis to judge anyone.  We would all simply be acquitted of any perceived indiscretion by the fact that we lived in accordance with the truth as we defined it.  In such a reality, even the concept of good and evil becomes abstract, as what I define as evil another may define as good (e.g. flying a plane into the World Trade Center).  If God has no means by which to hold us accountable, His role is reduced to that of a cosmic bystander.  We can invoke His name and claim to believe in Him, but ultimately it becomes of no consequence.

Posted in Lists | Leave a Comment »

Me & My Shadow

February 25, 2010 by bjcorbin

As she prayed, she saw her shadow on the wall and something about it troubled her.  Despite her best efforts to ignore it, her eyes kept drawing back to it; and finally in frustration, she interrupted her prayer.

“Lord, what is it about this shadow that is so troubling to me?” she asked.

She was more than a little surprised when He very clearly and immediately replied, “It is not the shadow itself that troubles you, it is what it represents.”

After a brief pause to ponder what He might be referring to, she continued, “Lord, what is it that the shadow represents?”

Again, with great clarity He said, “It represents places where the light has been blocked.”

His words sparked a revelation within her, as she added, “Or in this case, the places where I’m blocking the light.”

“Indeed” He acknowledged.

The thought of it made her feel exposed and ashamed, even though she could tell that the Lord was not upset with her.  She unconsciously began to wrestle with ideas about how she might avoid casting such a shadow; and after taking some time to consider it, she asked, “Is it even possible to walk in the light without casting a shadow?”

“It is possible”, He replied; “but it’s something that you really have to want.”

Confused, she asked, “What kind of Christian wouldn’t want that?”

“One who craves the approval of men” He said.  “For those people, it is important that the spotlight remain on them.  They see their shadow as a representation of their stature within my kingdom and thus they work hard to cast it as tall and wide as they can.  They often justify it with words like ‘anointing’ or ‘influence’, and they convince themselves that I am somehow glorified by them being glorified.  But in truth it is nothing more than the silhouette that their image creates when they stand in front of the light.  What they don’t recognize is that to those people who chose to stand in their shadow, they are nothing more than an obstruction to the light.”

A wave of conviction rolled over her, as she pondered what kind of shadow her life might be casting.  Tentatively she asked, “Lord, are there people standing in my shadow?”

“Just as the light that comes from your life, so also does your shadow affect your husband, your children, your family, friends, neighbors and co-workers.  It is a condition that is common to all men”, He replied.

“Then how is it possible to walk without casting a shadow?” she asked.

“It can only happen when the light comes from within you” He replied.

She was at once amazed by the simplicity of His answer and challenged by the implications of it.  “But how can I make the light come from within me?” she pleaded.

“You must understand that it does not happen by talking about the light, or pointing to it, or trying to control it, or trying to market it or by trying to legislate it.  The light can only come from within when you succumb to it” He said.

As His words resonated within her, tears began to well up in her eyes and she felt an overwhelming desire to surrender herself to Him anew.  As she raised her trembling hands to Him, she said, “Lord, let it be so in me”.

Posted in Heart of "The Father", Word Pictures | Tagged , , | 4 Comments »

The State of the Union

February 18, 2010 by bjcorbin

I’ve tried hard to resist the urge to write one of these, as I’ve recently seen so many others share their opinions under this same title. Unfortunately, none of those articles really resonated with me and so here I go. Before I start, let me say that I possess absolutely no credentials that should cause anyone to accept my opinion above their own; I’m simply appealing to what I consider to be “common sense”, which assumes that there is such a thing. Instead of trying to weave together an epic speech (which would undoubtedly take more time than I have to spend on this), I’m just going to throw out some bullets, which are the literary equivalent of a sound bite.

• Finger pointing and rhetoric aren’t going to solve the issues that face our nation. While the politicians continue to offer simple solutions to complex problems, we as a country are wasting precious time and resources on programs that have no hope of improving things in the long term. If the problems were that easy to resolve, someone else would have already taken care of them. The issues are layered and interwoven; how you address one will affect the others. For instance, adopting tougher environmental standards in the US, will affect the ability of American companies to compete in a global marketplace (where other countries may have no such standards). That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do it, but it does mean that we must undertake such changes with a clear understanding of the overall impact and a plan to handle the consequences Solving these problems will be much more like solving a “Rubik’s Cube” than winning a game of Tic-Tac-Toe.
• Health Care reform is not the most pressing issue facing our nation. The “Health Care Crisis” as it has been dubbed in political circles has been a highly effective tool used to distract the people from the most pressing issues of the day. The truth is that even uninsured people in America have some access to health care and while their situation does warrant attention, America’s economic crisis threatens to impact a far greater number of people. The collapse of the”Consumer Based Economy” constitutes much more than a simple cyclic downturn that will eventually work itself out. The government (& the media) seems to think that if they can just convince the American people that the economy is on the way back up, that we’ll somehow spend our way to economic recovery. This of course ignores the obvious, which is that people without jobs or homes, are in no position to borrow or spend money. Until America finds a way to legitimately improve its position in the global marketplace, our economy is going to struggle.
• Merely creating “jobs” isn’t going to fix the problem. Another word game that is played in political circles centers on the idea of creating jobs. First of all, it’s not merely jobs that people need. They need careers or vocations. Car loans are normally four to five years, mortgages are twenty to thirty years, paying for college can be even worse; so funding some highway project, that employees me to wave a flag for six months, doesn’t exactly meet my long term needs. History would indicate that the government isn’t the entity that is best suited for job creation; so maybe the “job creation” initiatives need to be more focused on getting American industry back on its feet and competitive in the world marketplace. Give a man a fish, feed him for a day; teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.
• Bi-partisanship is destroying our government process. At the end of the last administration, it was clear that the Republicans had failed to chart a course for this country that inspired confidence in the majority of Americans. After a year of the Democrat’s “super majority”, it’s clear that they have no such course either. I sense that most Americans are growing sick of both of these parties and that they are tired of choosing between the lesser of evils. I believe that the majority of Americans don’t agree with either the far left or the far right; and that they’re weary of being limited to those two options. If the mid-term elections go as predicted, we’re simply headed back to the same gridlock we’ve faced for almost two decades. Though a third party might help, three completely new parties would be even better.
• The members of Congress seem to have lost sight of the fact that they’re supposed to be representing the people and not working for the President. Nothing has demonstrated this more clearly than the health care reform debate. Despite the fact that the polls and the feedback from the “Town Hall Meetings” overwhelmingly suggest that the majority of Americans have some serious reservations about the proposed bills, Congress has doggedly pursued the passage of them in order to please the president. It now appears that the American people are poised to remind their government officials who they work for, when the next election cycle comes around.
• This isn’t the Health Care Reform the American people asked for. The problem is that too many American’s can’t afford the high price of Health Insurance and/or medical treatment. A solution that does nothing to regulate those skyrocketing costs, that takes away benefits from people who already have them, that places more financial burden on already struggling employers and that puts the government more in control of our day to day lives, is no solution at all. A real solution is going to take more time, cooperation and innovation than that.
• There is no place for a “Czar” in a democratic government. Our government was built upon a system of checks and balances, which were put in place to avoid any one person from circumventing the system. Slowly, but intently, we are now creating ways to bypass those checks and balances. History tells us that we will eventually rue the day that we allowed such a thing to happen.

I could go on, but I won’t. In the final analysis, I’m tired of politicians who seem eager to assign blame for our problems, but who don’t seem to have any innovative ideas about how to fix them; and who seem unwilling to work constructively with anyone of a differing point of view. Our government officials were supposed to be “public servants”, but over the last few decades they’ve managed to become more like trust fund babies, who we’ll be supporting for the rest of their lives. The “American Dream” began as a dream of having the opportunity to prosper; but over time it has eroded into some vague notion that we are somehow entitled to be prosperous, simply because we are American’s. I believe that unless something changes soon, we will once again be dreaming of the opportunity to prosper. (Bryan Corbin)

Posted in Opinions, Social / Political | 2 Comments »

Letter to My Newborn

February 15, 2010 by bjcorbin

Son Dearest Son,

It is very late in the evening, and as I write this letter you are sound asleep. The truth be told, you’ve been asleep for hours, but it was only in the last few minutes that I managed to let you go. I knew that becoming a father would be very special, but I never knew that my heart could be so full. It’s as if I’ve lived in the same two-story house for my whole life, only to discover that there’s actually a third floor. Your arrival has broken something open in me and I can’t seem to stop it from spilling out. I’ve barely been able to speak all day, but in this late hour I feel the need to try to put some things into words. I don’t know that what I’m about to write will make any sense, but it is my heart in this moment.

I guess that I should start by saying that you are the most precious thing that I’ve ever held in my hands. You have a face like an angel (just like your momma) and as your tiny hand wrapped around my finger, I just knew that you were a miracle sent from heaven. I guess that since babies are born everyday we don’t tend to think of it as miraculous, but now I understand that it is. I marvel that anyone who’s experienced this could doubt that there is a God. I feel humbled that He allowed me to be a part of it all. He surely could have given you to a better man; I hope that I don’t disappoint Him and I hope that you’re not disappointed either. I feel ill-equipped to be all that you’ll need me to be, but I am resolved to give it everything that I have. If I succeed at nothing else, I pray that you will grow up knowing how special you are and how much you are loved.

As much as I want to do & be everything for you, I realize that my influence on your life will only be for a season; and that long before I’m ready, you’ll be a man, making his own way in the world. In the time that I have, there is so much about life that I hope to teach you. I wish that I could tell you that it is how I’ve lived my life, but sometimes the way to discover what is true is to first figure out what is false. Unfortunately, I’ve learned many things that way in my lifetime. It is my hope that you will be a better man than I have been, so I will try to teach you the truth, even the parts that I haven’t lived yet. The thing about truth is that even though it can be a hard pill to swallow, it ultimately sets you free. I pray that the truth will always be welcomed in your life, because a man who deceives himself is incapable of being honest with anyone else.

I wish I could tell you that this new world you’ve come to is some sort of paradise, but honestly this life can be pretty hard. There is fear and pain and evil here, and things aren’t always fair. But son, there is also goodness and beauty and love in this world, and if you’ll watch for it, you’ll find it everywhere. God left His fingerprints on everything and if you’ll notice them, it will remind you that He’s always close by. Try not to keep score on how many good things or bad things happen in your life; be quick to forgive and to admit when you’re wrong, so that you can move past the hurtful things; and take time to enjoy and celebrate what is beautiful. Try to be the kind of person who builds up instead of tearing down, and who gives more than they’re looking to get. Always remember that the most miserable life you can live is one that is all about yourself.

As I held you today, my mind was filled with images of all the things that you might become; but honestly, I just want you to become whoever you were created to be. And the only one who can really get you there is the One who created you. Don’t worry when people tell you that believing in God is a crutch; the truth is that we all need something to lean on and if you look closely, you’ll see that everyone has some sort of crutch. The difference is that those other crutches don’t have the ability to bring peace or hope into your life. God means for us to lean on Him, which is why He only offers “daily bread”; because He wants us to come back every day. You see God is love and in the end that’s what it all boils down to; it is our deepest need, our strongest motivation, our greatest joy and ultimately what life is all about.

I guess it seems strange to be thinking about the end of your life on the day that it’s beginning, but if we understood from the start what will matter at the end, I think it would change how we lived in between. Don’t worry about what you don’t know; that’s what faith is for. Don’t worry about the ways that you will fall short; that’s what grace is for. Don’t worry what other people believe about you; just be careful what you choose to believe about yourself. Don’t get caught up in what this world calls success, because a man who is driven by the need for success is destined to be pursued by the fear of failure. Don’t let your heart be swayed by this world’s conception of beauty; the most beautiful face you’ll ever see is the one that looks back at you in love. Don’t be afraid to believe in what you can’t see or explain; it’s only the invisible things that really last and only the things that are bigger than we can comprehend that stir up our ability to hope.

I guess I can’t try to fit a whole lifetimes worth of advice into your first day. Now that I’ve written all of this down, I’m not really sure what to do with it. Maybe someday you’ll read it and more than heeding all of the advice, I hope you’ll have some greater understanding of how your arrival changed my life. I’m so grateful for the opportunity to be called your father, but I also know that before I held you in my hands today, you were in the hands of “The Father” and long after I’m gone, He will still be your Father. I pray that nothing I ever do will distort your view of Him, because even if I fail you, He never will. I love you son, I’m so glad that you’re here. God sure did a great job when He made you. I hope you will one day understand the miracle that you are.

With All of My Love – Dad

* * The sentiments that I expressed in this letter are no less true for any of my other children (including my step-daughter), but you can only experience the” first time” once and so this writing simply centers on that moment.

Posted in Heart of "The Father", Parenting / Family, Personal | 2 Comments »

3D (Dads Don’t Dance)

February 15, 2010 by bjcorbin

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Posted in Parenting / Family, Personal, Songs | Leave a Comment »

An Invitation

February 15, 2010 by bjcorbin

Dear Lord, as I begin a new day I confess my utter dependence on You

I do not have the strength nor wisdom nor purity of heart to face this day without You

Indeed I am undone, a man of unclean lips who comes from a people of unclean lips

Often more filled with my flesh than with Your Spirit

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because apart from You, I can do nothing

Lord I want to thank You for the abundance of my life

For a loving wife, for beautiful healthy children, for a wonderful family & friends

But I confess Lord that I have yet to love my wife as You loved the church

That I don’t always demonstrate Your character to those I claim to love

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because only You can work all things to the good of those who seek to fulfill Your purpose

Lord I confess that I have stared into the darkness & that at times it has overwhelmed me

That I have battled discouragement from the things that I’ve seen & heard

That I am often afraid of the kind of world that my children are growing up in

That I’ve often overestimated the enemy and underestimated You

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because only “perfect love” casts out fear

Lord I pray for my family, they are a precious gift from You

I have tried to be a spiritual leader, but I have often failed to yield to Your Spirit

I have often tried to serve You and them in my own strength and I’ve fallen woefully short

It is clear to me that I cannot change a heart or even a mind

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because no one comes to You unless You draw them

Lord I thank You for the changes that You’ve brought about in me and my life

I thank You that You didn’t hand me over to my own stubborn pursuits

That Your love has covered the multitude of my sins

But Lord despite Your abundant gifts to me, I have yielded little fruit

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because only You are able to complete the good work You’ve begun in me

Lord I pray that this day would be different from all of the others

That it wouldn’t be about my wants, needs, desires, thoughts…

But that it would be a day lived for You and about You and through You

That every thought would be in subjection to You, that my body would be a living sacrifice

I pray that my life would be an invitation to You

Because You are worthy of my praise – Amen

Posted in Prayers | Leave a Comment »

The Work That Only You Can Do

February 15, 2010 by bjcorbin

Lord, as I rise this morning, I confess that I am in need of the new mercies that You have set aside for me this day

I plead the blood of Jesus over my family and our home

I pray that no evil thing and that no thing in the natural could have its’ way in our home or in our family; that only You, by the power of Your Holy Spirit would have authority over us

Lord I lift up my precious wife to You and I thank You for the gift of her in my life

I pray that You would manifest Your love within me, so that I might love her as You have loved Your church

But Lord I know that no matter how much I love her, I cannot heal the hurts of the past or take away the challenges of today or bring her into the destiny You have for her;

So I pray that You would do the work that only You can do within her heart

Pull back the veil of deception that would try to keep her bound to the things of the past

I pray that You would manifest Yourself to her as the Comforter and the Counselor and the Healer and as the loving Father that You are.

Lord I lift up my beautiful family to You and I thank You for the gift of them in my life

I pray that You would manifest Your strength and gentleness within me, so that I might be the Father and the Son and the Brother that You have called me to be

But Lord I know that no matter how well I serve my family today, it will not keep them from the struggles that this life brings;

So I pray that You would do the work that only You can do in them

Pull back the veil of deception that would try to keep them grounded in the things of this world

I pray that You would go before them, that Your sovereign hand would be upon them and that You would draw them unto Yourself.

Lord I lift up this community, Your church and even this nation to You; I thank You for the freedom and the favor that we have known

I pray that You would manifest Your compassion and grace within me, so that I might love my neighbor as myself

But Lord I know that even if I am a faithful witness of Your goodness, that to those who are perishing, the cross is foolishness.

So I pray that You would do the work that only You can do in them

Pull back the veil of deception that means to keep their souls bound up in our fallen nature

I pray that You take the seeds that have been planted and watered, and bring about the increase that can only come from You.

Lord I come before You and thank You for the abundance of my life

I pray that Your character would be fully manifest within me and that You would somehow be glorified in my life

But Lord I know that my desire to be transformed into Your image is not enough to bring it about;

So I pray that You would come and do the work that only You can do

Pull back the veil of deception that tries to keep me from being the man I was created to be and walking in the inheritance that You died to give me

I pray that You would change my mind, change my heart and complete the good work that You have already begun it me.

In Jesus’ Precious Name – Amen

Posted in Prayers | Leave a Comment »

Why I Believe

February 13, 2010 by bjcorbin

I’m the kind of person who has a hard time taking someone else’s word for things. To some that makes me rebellious, to others it makes me a skeptic and to some others it might even make me seem wise. To be honest, I’m sure that I’ve been all of those things and probably many more. At times this trait has caused me needless pain (e.g. do you really need to touch the stove to believe that it’s hot) and at other times it has helped me to avoid traps that I’ve seen many of my contemporaries fall into. Regardless of how one might view this particular aspect of my personality, it has everything to do with the way my faith was formed.

Though I was raised in a devoutly Catholic family, my belief system was somewhat stunted by the fact that I struggled to find my own identity. Because I didn’t see how or where I fit in this world, I struggled to find a “present tense” for God as well. I believed that there was a God, that He created me and that when I died, I’d come face to face with Him (which wasn’t something that I necessarily looked forward to). I believed the Jesus story and had a sincere reverence for the things connected to Him; but in my young mind, God was a world away (i.e. in heaven), Jesus had died 2000 years ago and as best as I could tell, I was on my own. Though I had the vague impulse to “be a good person”, that wasn’t enough to keep me from sampling the things the world had to offer.

At that time in my life, what the world seemed to be offering was sex, drugs and rock-n-roll, and to be honest I pretty much dove in with both feet. While I wouldn’t claim to have tasted every dish on the buffet, I did partake of enough of them to learn some valuable lessons. I learned that sex with people you don’t really know or care about can be exhilarating in the heat of the moment, but that it ultimately leaves you feeling empty emotionally and spiritually. From that I concluded that forbidden fruit is enticing only as long as it stays forbidden; and that once you’ve gone there, it almost instantly grows stale. My experience with controlled substances taught me that everything that goes up, must come down; and that the descent always seems more profound and sustained than the visit to the summit. And though I’d still claim some fondness for rock-n-roll, I found that no matter how loud I turned up the music, it couldn’t drown out the voices in my own head. While the rock-n-roll lifestyle can create the illusion of a party, I found that it is only those things that have the ability to penetrate our hearts that cause us to truly celebrate. I emerged from this season of wandering disappointed and convinced that there had to be more to life than what I’d experienced.

Despite my disillusionment with what the world had to offer, I wasn’t necessarily ready to embrace, what to me was still, an abstract God. Though I found myself more willing to explore the possibilities, I approached Him with the same skepticism that had become a hallmark of my life’s journey. I couldn’t just accept the Bible’s claim to be God’s word, because after all, if it was a counterfeit, it would undoubtedly make that same claim. To my way of thinking, if the Bible was really “God breathed”, then the truth that I found there ought to be transcendent and life changing. Unlike my experience with the world, I dipped my toe gingerly into the pool of divinity, with little expectation of being truly fulfilled.

Though I made the mistake of reading the entire Old Testament first, it was ultimately in the gospels and the epistles of the New Testament that I began to see the story of my own life unfold. Though much of it seemed counterintuitive, I recognized that I’d always felt more blessed when I gave than when I received; that I’d always reaped what I’d sown; that my attempts to gain my life had ultimately caused me to lose it; and that no matter how extravagant my house (i.e. life) may have looked on the exterior, without a firm foundation, it was destined to crumble at the first real storm. I also discovered that when Jesus departed 2000 years ago, He did not leave us as orphans, worshipping a historical God; but instead that He’d given us the gift of His Holy Spirit, so that He could always be in the “present tense” for those who believe. As I began to look at the world through new eyes, I began to see that God’s invisible qualities are plain to see within the things that He’s created and I began to recognize His character in some of the people that I knew. The more I focused on spiritual things (i.e. the unseen realm), the more the world (i.e. the seen realm) began to make sense to me. Though it took some time, I was eventually able to suspend my skepticism long enough to take Him literally when He said, “My sheep know my voice; they hear me and they follow”. Once I began to recognize His voice, I realized that He’d been speaking to me all along. I loved what I heard Him saying and I loved the way He said it.

What I’d found wasn’t a philosophy, or a ritual, or a mantra, or an alternative lifestyle, or a new vehicle to obtain my desires, or something to fill up my Sunday mornings. It was a real live person, who knew me better than I knew myself and who could make sense of a world, and a life, that I often found confusing. I found in Him a place where I could be myself and not be ashamed or feel out of place. In Him, I found a peace and a hope that I’d never experienced; and something within me knew that this was my destiny. In the years since then, I’ve learned to trust His voice, in a way that I could’ve trusted anything before. I don’t have to touch the stove anymore to figure out whether it’s really hot. I found that what sex, drugs and rock-n-roll had promised, could only be delivered by faith, hope and love. There are some who might suppose that I’ve lost my mind to believe in such things, but at this point in my experience, it would take more faith than I could muster to believe in anything else. I believe that there is something inside of us that already knows how to be one with our Creator; because before we were in our mother’s womb, He knew us and I feel sure that on some level we also knew Him. The greatest breakthrough’s I’ve ever had in my relationship with God have always felt more like remembering something that I’d forgotten, than learning something that I’ve never known. I don’t think that our journey is really to a place we’ve never been before; I sense that it is ultimately a walk back to where we came from. When we get there, we’ll realize that it was Him all along. While I don’t pretend to have figured out all the mysteries of life and while I don’t have an answer for every skeptic’s question, I have come to know “Him” and because of who He is, I believe!

Posted in Personal | 1 Comment »

Made For Heaven

February 13, 2010 by bjcorbin

As my little boy walked in the door, I could tell by his expression that he wasn’t having a good day. I asked him what was wrong and he tried to say that it was nothing, but I knew that wasn’t true. I asked him to come to me and to tell me what was going on. Before he even reached me I could see that there were tears in his eyes and as he wrapped his arms around me, he let go of the emotion which had been piling up inside of him all day.

 

As he wept, I held him close, allowing him time to release those overwhelming feelings. Finally, I asked him what this was all about. He pulled his chin off my shoulder and looked me in the face.  His expression was full of pain and confusion as he asked, “Daddy, why do people have to be so mean; why do they have to tease, and be so hateful; why am I so different than everyone else, and why don’t I ever seem to fit in. I don’t feel like I belong here Daddy  Can we move someplace else; someplace where the people are nicer, someplace where I fit in!   Again, his emotions overwhelmed him, as he fell back into my embrace and wept bitterly. My heart broke for him, as I clearly recalled experiencing those same feelings.

 

As I held him, I began to rock him gently, praying that God would give me words of comfort for him. Slowly, this song rose out of my spirit and I sang it over him.

 

Peace, peace, little one

This is not your home

You were made for brighter days

And a Kingdom yet to come

 

Hope, hope, little man

Don’t fall into despair

God will go before you

And you’re always in His care

 

Run, run little feet

Run into the light

You were never meant for wrath

And you’re precious in His sight

 

Rest, rest, little soul

This life is just a dream

Like a shepherd, He will guide you

And bring you to the stream

 

Pray, pray, little son

Your Father hears your plea

He formed you with His very hands

And made you to be free

 

Shine, shine, little light

He’s freed you from the snare

He’s placed His robe upon you

And now He calls you” heir”

 

Sing, sing, little voice

Your strength is found in joy

Your Father loves when you believe

And trust Him like a boy

 

Love, love, little heart

It’s the only way to live

Don’t let fear hold you back

Give all you have to give

 

Burn, burn, little flame

The Spirit dwells in you

He yearns to be revealed

Making all things new

 

Rise, rise, little king

The war’s already won

You will have some battles

But victory when they’re done

 

Peace, peace, little one

This is not your home

You were made for brighter days

And a Kingdom yet to come

 

As I sang, I could feel a calm settle over him and I thought he might actually be falling asleep; but after a few moments of silence, he once again pulled his head from my shoulder and looked at me.

 

“So you’re saying that the reason I don’t fit in here is because this isn’t really my home?” he asked.

 

“That’s right”, I replied. “You were made for heaven!”

 

He smiled and said, “So I’m like an alien in this world?”

 

“Yup” I replied. “You’re really just an ambassador, visiting this planet to let people know about the great place that you come from. You were never really meant to feel at home here.”

 

His face seemed to brighten at that idea, as he said, “cool”.

 

He slide off my lap and began to walk away, when he suddenly turned back, with a thoughtful look on his face. “You know what Dad” he asked.

 

“What son” I replied.

 

“I can’t wait to get home”, he said.

 

I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I replied, “Me too son, me too.”

Posted in Heart of "The Father", Parenting / Family, Personal | Leave a Comment »

10 Thoughts for My Future Son and/or Daughter In-Laws

February 13, 2010 by bjcorbin

 

As a father of four (two sons and two daughters), it seems inevitable that I will one day occupy the position of “father-in-law” in somebody’s life.  Though that may still be some years away (I hope!), I’ve been watching my peers go through this process and I’ve noticed how often fiancé’s talk about wanting to have a great relationship with their future in-laws.  Since I’m confident that I won’t be included in the selection process, I thought it might be helpful to make a list for these future family members.  After all, I want to have a great relationship with them too!

1.      This marriage is going to cost you!  I sincerely hope that you’ve decided that my child is Mr. or Mrs. Right, that you guys were meant to be together, that you have great chemistry…etc, but even if all of that is true, you need to understand that sharing your life with someone will always involve sacrifice.  If that isn’t what you’re signing up for, I’d recommend reconsidering your position.

2.      I have x-ray vision & I plan on using it.  I’m sure that you’re going to make a big effort to make a good impression when we meet and I appreciate that; but I can promise you that my biggest concern will be with what’s in your heart.  If I sense the kind of love that I have for my child in your heart, I feel certain that we’ll get along just fine.

3.      Get ready to be disappointed.  I hope that your courtship has been like a great fairytale romance and that your wedding will be a kind of coronation of that great love; but truthfully, day to day life is rarely like that.  There will undoubtedly be struggles and disappointments along the way and how you handle those things together will ultimately define your marriage.  I have found that if your love is genuine, the struggles will only make that bond stronger.

4.      I cannot be an unbiased, casual observer.  In these days of political correctness it is tempting to claim that I will be a completely unbiased, casual observer, in your relationship with my son or daughter, but for me that would be a lie.  While I do understand that your life will be your own and that I need to respect the boundaries you establish, I don’t have it within me to be casual or unbiased in my feelings for my children.  That does not mean that I will be against you or that I will be unwilling to find fault in your spouse.  It is my hope that my feelings will eventually become just as biased for you.

5.      Remember where the hole was.  There is a void within our hearts that can only be filled by someone who genuinely cares for us; but the danger in long term relationships is that over time we can forget what life was like before that hole was filled.  One of the most common terminal illnesses’ that strikes in relationships is when people begin to take each other for granted.  Though I hope that your life together will bring about a sense of inner wholeness, I also pray that you will never forget where the hole used to be.

6.      Don’t marry my child for what you hope they will bring to your life.  Though I would hope that marrying one of my children will bring great things to your life, I pray that this would not be your sole motivation for the marriage.  The love that I have for my kids compels me to hope for someone who wants to bring something to their lives.  If you’re simply looking for someone to make you feel loved and to be there for you, I’d recommend buying a cat.  It’s cheaper, it’s easier and you can even have them de-clawed.

7.      Honesty is still the best policy.  If you really want a relationship that lasts, forget just about everything that you’ve ever seen on television or in movies about how to handle relationships.  It’s not supposed to be a battle, or a power struggle, or a game, or filled with intrigue and manipulation.  Just be honest from the beginning.  That not only goes for your marriage, it will also help tremendously with you and me.

8.      The easiest way to gain treasure is to treasure what you have.   If you treat something valuable as though it is old junk it will eventually become old junk.  Relationships work the same way.  Contrary to popular mythology, it is not often the younger, more physically attractive person that steals a spouse; it is generally the one who makes them feel more valued.

9.      Put all your eggs in one basket.  Once you’ve decided on your life’s mate, I suggest that you change your view of every other member of the opposite sex.  Begin to view every older person like a parent, every peer like a sibling and every younger person like one of your children.  Reserve every bit of your romantic and sexual energy (including your thoughts) for your mate.  If you do this, you’ll be amazed at how passionate your marriage will stay.

10.  God has a destiny for my child.  It is my personal belief that God created each of my children with a destiny and in the time they’ve been with me, it’s been my mission to help them in finding it.  If you will take that on as your mission, you will always have my support.

Note – The fact that this document contains no mention of grandchildren should not be misinterpreted. 

Some things go without saying.  If you don’t know my feelings about children, we’ve clearly never met.

Posted in Heart of "The Father", Lists, Parenting / Family, Personal | Leave a Comment »

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