Bjcorbin's Blog

There are a lot of philosophies out there about the best way to raise children, but I’ve noticed that the fruit of many of them isn’t particularly worthwhile.  In that vein, I offer the following bit of satire. 

 

 

Homegrown

I tried to give them all the things I never had

And now they feel entitled to everything they want

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Anytime they were hungry, we’d run through the drive thru

And now they can’t seem to endure anything that’s not fast and easy

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Whenever we went to the store, I’d get them a little something

And now they struggle with spending money that they don’t have

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When they played sports, I made sure that everyone got the same trophy

And now they expect the same pay as the people who actually show up to work

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I taught them that every person gets to decide what they accept as “the truth”

And now the only thing they seem to believe in is themselves

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Every time they had a bad coach or teammate, I pulled them off the team

And now they refuse to work for or with anyone they don’t like

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Anytime they struggled in a class, I’d storm the doors of the principal’s office

And now they blame everyone else for their problems

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I taught them that freedom was their unalienable right

And now they feel like nobody can say anything when they’re wrong

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I made sure that they didn’t have to work like I did

And now they’re not willing to work like they need to

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I did everything for them

And now I’m raising their kids

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I gave them every advantage

And I can’t understand how they turned out this way

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I wonder what’s going to happen if I ever need their help