Like most kids who grew up in the 1960’s and 70’s, my parents had home movies they’d occasionally pull out and show on a big projector screen. One that particularly sticks out in my mind is of my brothers and I playing on the street in front of my grandmother’s house in Brooklyn. It was a cold, dreary looking day, and we were all in our winter coats, but we were running around with the sort of abandon that only young children seem to possess.
I believe that I was about 5 yrs old in the film, which would make my brothers 6 yrs and 7 yrs old. In particular it was my brother Tom (the oldest sibling) who stood out. His big eyes and childlike manner in these movies were such a sharp contrast to the serious and pragmatic fellow he would eventually become. These old reels were some of the only evidence that he’d not really started out that way.
Life has a way of pushing back against innocence and cultivating cynicism. And for little boys, wide eyed compassion and sensitivity aren’t generally a sustainable course. Very quickly it becomes clear that having such emotions or at least allowing folks to know that you have them, is a precarious path to take. Early on, it becomes a matter of survival to learn how to hide your vulnerabilities and to always come from a position of strength. For many young men that manifests in a form of aggressiveness that is generally accepted for young males. For my brother Tom, it manifested in the form of intellect.
My brother had a brilliant mind and was usually one of the smartest guys in the room. He also had the ability to express himself, which made his intelligence harder to ignore. Because my father was in the Air Force, we changed schools constantly, but wherever we’d go my brother would quickly be viewed as the smartest kid in the class. As the sensitive nurturing elements of his personality receded into dormancy, the power of his mind emerged. He wasn’t just smart, he was a born leader, and soon that was all you could see.
As a younger brother, who had no desire to be led by someone I thought of as a peer, I just viewed him as overbearing and bossy. By the time we got to high school, his identity as the smart kid was already set in stone, and he further solidified it by dating the smartest girl in school. In those days, if you had asked anyone who knew my brother to describe him with three adjectives, his intelligence would have been referenced with the first word.
Forty-five years later, as I sat through the various memorial services celebrating my brother’s (too short) life, I suddenly recalled those scenes of us frolicking on the street as kids, and I realized that not one person had made a singular reference to his intelligence. Indeed, there was barely any mention of the impressive work he had done at Ball Aerospace (e.g., the Hubble Telescope, the Mars Rover), or any of his other accomplishments.
As the montage of pictures scrolled across the screen, they were mostly scenes of Tom with his grandchildren, or his god children, or dear friends, or with his beloved wife. In many of them he was dressed funny and clearly goofing around with that same sort of abandon that we’d had as children.
When people eulogized him, it was his warmth, compassion, faith, and wisdom they spoke of. And I found myself wondering how this transformation had occurred. What was it that allowed my brother’s true heart to re-emerge over all these years.
The short and simple answer is that the God who gave Him that heart, also worked throughout his life to preserve it. But at the center of God’s plan was Tom’s beloved wife Fawn.
By the time they’d met in high school, Tom had developed a pretty sharp edge to his personality, yet around her, he was like Jello. He was crazy about her from day one, and she was not the type of person to use that as leverage against him. If there were ever two people who seemed destined for each other, it was these two, and absolutely no one was surprised that they married and spent a lifetime together.
Looking back, I realize that because Fawn loved my brother for who he was, she made it safe for the nurturing, loving, playful part of his heart to re-emerge. Because she routinely engaged that part of his being, it regained strength and eventually became the hallmark of his legacy. Though it sounds cliche, she brought out the best in him. And to his credit, I believe that he did that for her as well.
As I pondered all this, I couldn’t help but think that this is exactly what God had in mind for marriage. That these unions were meant to amount to more than just the sum of the parts. That both partners would help each other become the people they were created to be.
If Tom had chosen to spend his life with someone who only related to him on an intellectual level, he may well have become a stoic recluse. Thankfully, he found a loving soul, who was full of spirit, and every bit his intellectual equal. She loved his heart and nurtured it throughout their years together.
In my brother’s final days, the room was filled with people who loved him and whose lives had been touched by his. And right by his side was his beloved partner Fawn. Though we could wish for more days, it would be hard to imagine a better way to finish the race.
He who finds a wife of worth, receives the favor of the Lord (Prov.18:22)
A wife of noble character is worth far more than rubies (Prov.31:10)
Neglecting Our Salvation
Posted in Commentaries, tagged apathy, Calvin, choices, chosen, complacency, confessing Christ, consequences, contribute, covenant, cross, faith, full counsel of scripture, Hebrew, Jesus, just believe, mantra, neglecting, neighbor, obedience, obey, reconciliation, salvation, scripture, shortcut, theology, works on September 15, 2026| Leave a Comment »
There is an increasingly popular brand of theology that centers on the idea that God has done 100% of the work for our salvation and thus we have no part to play. It comes cloaked in a reverence for the awesomeness of God’s provision yet subversively relieves us of any responsibility in terms of how we respond to that gift. It essentially argues that God’s grace is so great that it covers us regardless of how we choose to live.
These doctrines hang on passages like, “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no man may boast (Eph.2:8-9)” or “If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved (Rom.10:9).”
Jonathan Edwards famously said, “You contribute nothing to your salvation except the sin that made it necessary.”
John Calvin went so far as to say that God chooses who will go to heaven, that we have no ability to choose God if He doesn’t choose us, and that we have no ability to resist Him if He does. Again, this theology relieves the beneficiaries of all responsibility (while leaving the unchosen completely without hope and making the Great Commission pointless).
While the originators of such theologies may not have intended for these ideas to lead people away from the narrow path, they breed complacency in our relationship with God and apathy in our relationship to our neighbors. The appeal of these paradigms lies in the concept that nothing is really required of us and that no matter what we do, we cannot lose this awesome inheritance.
There is even a modern worship chorus that goes, “I could never mess it up, I could never mess it up, I’m loved, I’m chosen, Your arms wide open, I could never mess it up” (The Perfect Love of Jesus – LO Worship & Adohan King).
While the Hebrew writer extols the superiority of the covenant Jesus gained for us (Heb.8), he also challenges us to consider the consequences of “neglecting” this great salvation (Heb.2:1-3). To do that, we must consider the full counsel of scripture.
Paul certainly told the Romans that they needed to confess with their mouth (Rom.10:9) and Jesus warned that those who are ashamed to confess His name before men will reap eternal consequences (Mark 8:38, Luke 9:26). But simply confessing Christ isn’t an end unto itself. Jesus said, “Not everyone who says to me, Lord, Lord (i.e., confesses Christ’s name), will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father (Matt.7:21-23).”
Similarly, both Paul and Jesus address the importance of believing (Rom.10:9, John 3:15), but it is still a giant leap to turn those words into the popular “Just Believe” mantra. James chides, “You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that – and shudder (James 2:19), while 1 John 2:4 unequivocally states, “Whoever says, I know Him, but fails to keep and obey His commandments is a liar.”
The scripture clearly states that we cannot earn our salvation (Eph.2:8-9), but Jesus also said that if we love Him, we will obey His commandments (John 14:15). Not as payment for what He did, but as the fruit of our trust in, and fidelity to Him. Likewise, our good works don’t gain us God’s approval, but James makes it clear that a faith that isn’t strong enough to manifest itself into works is dead (James 2:20).
To be sure, God is the One who orchestrated our salvation, Jesus is the One who fulfilled mankind’s part of the covenant, and no one would come to Him without His drawing (John 6:44). In that regard, it is right to say that I had nothing to do with facilitating my own salvation. But the cross demands a response and our failure to respond has implications.
Even the concept that we love God comes with an expectation. When asked about the greatest commandment Jesus certainly placed loving God at the center of our mission (Mark 12:30 – love the Lord with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength). If He had stopped there, our passion for the Lord might be enough. But He went on to command that we love our neighbor as ourselves (Mark 12:31) and before He went to the cross, Jesus raised that bar to loving them as He loves them (John 13:34)
Once again, the full counsel of scripture tells us that if a man says that he loves God, yet hates his brother, he is a liar (1 John 4:20); and that whatever we do unto the least of these, we do unto God (Matt.25:40 & 45).
To be sure, things like believing in God, confessing Christ, being obedient to His commands, good works and loving Him are all a part of walking out our salvation. But simply grabbing a hold of one of those concepts and ignoring the rest of scripture is to our own peril.
Jesus is our example, and He laid down His life in order to reveal the Father’s heart to a lost and dying world (John 14:9). Now, He is asking us to lay down our lives to reveal Him (Col.1:27) to a world that still desperately needs to find Him. He came that we might be reconciled to God and He has left to us the “Ministry of Reconciliation (2Cor.5:18)”. There is no shortcut, it will cost everything (Matt.10:39, Rom.12).
To follow Jesus, we must deny ourselves and take up our cross daily (Matt.16:24). If we try to gain our lives, we’ll ultimately lose them (Matt.16:25). If we refuse to take up our cross, Jesus says that we are not worthy of Him (Matt.10:38).
The cross demands a response and the choices we make reveal our hearts.
Choices to make:
(Deut.30:19) Life and death; blessings and curses
(Josh.24:15) Whom you will serve
(Matt.6:24) God and money
(Matt.7:13) The narrow gate and the broad gate
(Gal.5:16) The Spirit and the flesh
(James 4:6) Friendship with the world and relationship with God
(1Cor.3:19) The wisdom of men or the wisdom of God
Things to do:
(2Cor.4:18) Don’t focus on what is seen
(Prov.4:23) Guard your heart
(Heb.12:2) Fix your eyes on Jesus
(John 15:4-5) Abide in the vine
(1Thes.5:16-18) Pray without ceasing and in all things give thanks
(John13:34) Love others as He loves them
(1John 2:27) Live by the Spirit
God does not demand perfection, but He yearns for sincerity (2Chro.16:9).
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