(Written many years ago)
Long ago, in a kingdom far away, there was a magnificent king, whose reign was without precedence. His wife the queen had borne him many sons, and with each kingdom that his army conquered, he would crown one of his sons as the ruler over that new land. This continued until all of his sons were on the thrones of their own kingdoms. Yet even then his domain grew.
On this night, the king’s palace was filled with the noise that accompanies a large celebration; there was music and laughter and occasionally boisterous shouts of joy. Despite these festivities, the king’s personal servant (Thaddeus) noticed that the king was alone on the vast balcony adjacent to the ballroom. Though Thaddeus knew from the king’s posture that he was deep in thought, his affection for the king compelled him to interrupt. He was not afraid to approach, as the king was always patient and kind with his servants. As Thaddeus reached him, he bowed low and said,
“Begging your pardon, sire, is all well with you?”
The king’s eyes remained fixed on the dimly lit horizon, but his face shifted into a shallow smile; “You are a faithful servant, Thaddeus, and I am thankful for your concern,” he said.
This response left Thaddeus in the awkward position of not knowing whether to dismiss himself or to wait for additional response. As Thaddeus was prone to, he chose to wait. After a thoughtful pause, the king continued
“I am pondering matters of the kingdom and I find myself with the need to speak of it.” At that, he turned to Thaddeus and looked him in the eyes. “Would you be willing to serve me in such a way?” he said.
Thaddeus felt the blood rush to his face. While the king had, on occasion, asked him about happenings within the household, he wondered what he could possibly contribute to a discussion on matters of the kingdom. His voice broke slightly as he responded, “Sire, I will endeavor to serve you in any way that you see fit, but wouldn’t the members of your court be better suited for such a dialogue?”
“Indeed, that would often be true, but these matters concern them, thus it would seem imprudent in this instance,” he replied.
Thaddeus bowed his head and said, “Let it be as you wish, lord.”
The king began, “Today, we celebrate the victory over still another foreign kingdom and yet, for the first time, I have not a son to crown as its king.” Then, after another thoughtful pause he continued, “Many suppose that I have bestowed each of my sons with his own kingdom as a gift to them, yet in truth I meant for each of my sons to be a gift to the people within those lands. I know the hearts of my sons and had one of them not been true, I would not have entrusted him with a crown. I have found that royalty is not passed through the bloodlines, but that it is carefully nurtured in one’s heart. As I look out on the vast horizon, I must now distinguish the man whose heart is prepared to sit upon the throne of this new kingdom.” Again the king paused, and then thoughtfully said, “The heart of a man is not easily judged by the heart of another.”
Thaddeus could feel the weight of the king’s thoughts, and hoping to encourage him, he said, “You are a good and wise king, surely you will find this man whom you seek.”
The king smiled broadly, and with warmth in his face, he asked Thaddeus, “Whom do you see who might be fit for the rule of a kingdom?”
Thaddeus felt unworthy to even ponder such a thing, but he was intent on serving his king. “Your court is filled with noble men, lord, surely one of them would be fit,” he responded.
“Speak freely, Thaddeus, whom do you see?” asked the king.
“I see Sir Fredric, the governor of the southern province, sire. He seems to be a man of influence and persuasion, knowledgeable in the ways of government and diplomacy. Surely such a man would make a fine king,” said Thaddeus.
“Indeed, what you have said of Fredric is true, he is a very capable man and certainly well respected, but while he is knowledgeable in matters of the kingdom, he seems to lack an awareness of those closest to him. His own family suffers from his neglect of their most basic needs. A man who fails to provide for his own family is not fit for the leadership of any other,” the king responded.
Thaddeus was embarrassed by the king’s quick dismissal of his suggestion and he wished that the king would simply dismiss him, but instead the king nodded for him to continue.
“What of your scribe, Denard? He is a man who knows your decrees and tenants well, a man who is knowledgeable in matters of truth,” suggested Thaddeus.
“Again, my servant, you have spoken well. Denard is a man who is knowledgeable of the truth, but, alas, his heart is full of compromise. Many are the men who acknowledge the truth, but few are those who embrace it. A man who does not hold to the truth is like a ship without a rudder, he is a vessel unworthy of being followed,” concluded the king.
Again, Thaddeus yearned to flee from this dialogue. He was clearly not fit to speak of such things, but again the king nodded for him to continue.
“Sire, what of Sir Stephen, the head of your royal guard? He seems to be a man without fear, decisive and strong, a leader among men. Surely such a man could lead a kingdom,” asserted Thaddeus.
“Indeed, Stephen is a valiant warrior and quite naturally a leader, but he is also a man of little mercy. While that quality may serve him on the battlefield, it is needful in matters of the kingdom,” said the king.
Exasperated, Thaddeus allowed his discouragement to spill onto his face, but the patient eyes of the king quickly calmed him. “Go on,” said the king.
“Lord, what of the sage, Philibus? He is a man of great wisdom and learning, even you look to him for counsel. Certainly he would have the wisdom to guide a kingdom,” said Thaddeus.
“Indeed, Philibus is a man full of wise words and I do value his counsel, but wise words are merely seeds, which will only blossom into wisdom when they find a fertile heart to act upon them. Each person has been endowed with certain gifts, and to be sure, Philibus is among the most gifted men in the kingdom; but while the nature of a gift ought to breed humility, it has instead become vanity in Philibus. He is a man of little discretion, blinded by his conceit and ambition,” said the king.
At this, Thaddeus dropped his head, feeling as though he had failed in his service to the king.
The king sensed this frustration and asked, “Thaddeus, are you my slave or my servant?”
Thaddeus was surprised by the question and his eyes rose to meet the king’s. “I am your servant, sire,” he said.
“What do you see as the difference between the servant and the slave?”
“The servant is free to leave whenever he chooses,” he replied.
“Then what keeps you here, Thaddeus?” asked the king.
“It is my honor to serve you, my king,” he said.
“Do you despise your station as a mere servant?” asked the king.
Again, surprised by the question, Thaddeus replied, “No, my lord, I believe that my service is virtuous.”
The king again smiled broadly and said, “I believe that too.”
Thaddeus was confused by the king’s inquiries and again wondered if he should dismiss himself, but after another short pause, the king began to speak,
“Thaddeus, why shouldn’t I crown you as the king of this new land?”
Thaddeus was stunned by the king’s question and he stumbled to find words, “I am but a lowly servant,” he said.
“Do you believe that you are lowly by fate or by destiny?” asked the king.
Thaddeus had never considered such a thing and was at a loss to respond. Before he could answer the king answered,
“I believe that it is by fate, but that you have been destined for greater things”
“My lord, I am honored by your words, but what do I know of ruling a kingdom?” asked Thaddeus.
“You have been at my side for years, your understanding is deeper than you know and a heart that yearns to serve will always find a way to serve. It is the only heart that can be entrusted with the lives of the people,” responded the king.
Thaddeus stared into the compassionate eyes of his king and he felt hot tears streaming down his face. The king reached down, placing his hand on Thaddeus’ head, and said, “You shall now have a whole kingdom to serve.”
In the years that followed that fateful day, the wise judgment of the magnificent king was affirmed as good king Thaddeus served the people of his kingdom with humility, honesty, wisdom and mercy.
“For it is the one who is least among you all who is the greatest (Luke 9:48)”
Bjcorbin's Blog 
Finding God’s Favor
Posted in Commentaries, Tributes, tagged aggressiveness, beloved, childlike, children, compassion, cynicism, faith, frolicking, grandchildren, Heart, innocence, intellect, intelligence, nurture, nurturing, partner, sensitivity, sibling, smart, transformation, vulnerabilities, wife, wisdom on May 26, 2025| 1 Comment »
Like most kids who grew up in the 1960’s and 70’s, my parents had home movies they’d occasionally pull out and show on a big projector screen. One that particularly sticks out in my mind is of my brothers and I playing on the street in front of my grandmother’s house in Brooklyn. It was a cold, dreary looking day, and we were all in our winter coats, but we were running around with the sort of abandon that only young children seem to possess.
I believe that I was about 5 yrs old in the film, which would make my brothers 6 yrs and 7 yrs old. In particular it was my brother Tom (the oldest sibling) who stood out. His big eyes and childlike manner in these movies were such a sharp contrast to the serious and pragmatic fellow he would eventually become. These old reels were some of the only evidence that he’d not really started out that way.
Life has a way of pushing back against innocence and cultivating cynicism. And for little boys, wide eyed compassion and sensitivity aren’t generally a sustainable course. Very quickly it becomes clear that having such emotions or at least allowing folks to know that you have them, is a precarious path to take. Early on, it becomes a matter of survival to learn how to hide your vulnerabilities and to always come from a position of strength. For many young men that manifests in a form of aggressiveness that is generally accepted for young males. For my brother Tom, it manifested in the form of intellect.
My brother had a brilliant mind and was usually one of the smartest guys in the room. He also had the ability to express himself, which made his intelligence harder to ignore. Because my father was in the Air Force, we changed schools constantly, but wherever we’d go my brother would quickly be viewed as the smartest kid in the class. As the sensitive nurturing elements of his personality receded into dormancy, the power of his mind emerged. He wasn’t just smart, he was a born leader, and soon that was all you could see.
As a younger brother, who had no desire to be led by someone I thought of as a peer, I just viewed him as overbearing and bossy. By the time we got to high school, his identity as the smart kid was already set in stone, and he further solidified it by dating the smartest girl in school. In those days, if you had asked anyone who knew my brother to describe him with three adjectives, his intelligence would have been referenced with the first word.
Forty-five years later, as I sat through the various memorial services celebrating my brother’s (too short) life, I suddenly recalled those scenes of us frolicking on the street as kids, and I realized that not one person had made a singular reference to his intelligence. Indeed, there was barely any mention of the impressive work he had done at Ball Aerospace (e.g., the Hubble Telescope, the Mars Rover), or any of his other accomplishments.
As the montage of pictures scrolled across the screen, they were mostly scenes of Tom with his grandchildren, or his god children, or dear friends, or with his beloved wife. In many of them he was dressed funny and clearly goofing around with that same sort of abandon that we’d had as children.
When people eulogized him, it was his warmth, compassion, faith, and wisdom they spoke of. And I found myself wondering how this transformation had occurred. What was it that allowed my brother’s true heart to re-emerge over all these years.
The short and simple answer is that the God who gave Him that heart, also worked throughout his life to preserve it. But at the center of God’s plan was Tom’s beloved wife Fawn.
By the time they’d met in high school, Tom had developed a pretty sharp edge to his personality, yet around her, he was like Jello. He was crazy about her from day one, and she was not the type of person to use that as leverage against him. If there were ever two people who seemed destined for each other, it was these two, and absolutely no one was surprised that they married and spent a lifetime together.
Looking back, I realize that because Fawn loved my brother for who he was, she made it safe for the nurturing, loving, playful part of his heart to re-emerge. Because she routinely engaged that part of his being, it regained strength and eventually became the hallmark of his legacy. Though it sounds cliche, she brought out the best in him. And to his credit, I believe that he did that for her as well.
As I pondered all this, I couldn’t help but think that this is exactly what God had in mind for marriage. That these unions were meant to amount to more than just the sum of the parts. That both partners would help each other become the people they were created to be.
If Tom had chosen to spend his life with someone who only related to him on an intellectual level, he may well have become a stoic recluse. Thankfully, he found a loving soul, who was full of spirit, and every bit his intellectual equal. She loved his heart and nurtured it throughout their years together.
In my brother’s final days, the room was filled with people who loved him and whose lives had been touched by his. And right by his side was his beloved partner Fawn. Though we could wish for more days, it would be hard to imagine a better way to finish the race.
He who finds a wife of worth, receives the favor of the Lord (Prov.18:22)
A wife of noble character is worth far more than rubies (Prov.31:10)
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